Friday, March 13, 2009

The dark side of my testimony...

So, yesterday I checked my myspace for the first time in like four months, and I was wondering around my friends profiles. I ended up on my friend Kim's profile. Kim used to be more like a sister to me than a friend. She is prolly one of the top two people I was closest to. it was between her and my best friend Steven. Well, Steven had always gone to church, but always thought it was stupid and never put anything forth for it. He stil went every sunday cause of his mother. well long story short, Steven gets into church and then gets me into it. I was very busy between school and work already. Now adding church and youth group and small groups on top of that. No time for much else. So, the extremely unfortunate thing that I realy still struggle with today is that I left a lot of my friends behind. Friends that I said that I would alwyas be there for. Now Kim was prolly the person I miss the most. After we stopped hanging out a lot she started to fall into the wrong crowd. She began drinking and doing drugs, and she starting hanging out with all te kids that had drugged themself stupid. She used to be a cute lil tomboy, and now she is thi whole other person. I'm not saying she is, because she won't talk to me so I don't know. For a long time I felt responsible for her making the wrong choices by not being there, and then I felt like I got shot in the face when a couple people, some people I was trying to build a relationship back with, told me that if I would have been here she would not be like this. More than one person told me this. Now, I really feel like this is totally my fault. Now the question is: What do I do?

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